Today was the Interact car wash, at first i wasn't even going to go, but I decided I've had enough of being "uneasy" and i wanted to get out of the house. at the time i didn't realize it, but it was good that i went out, but i'll get back to that more later. So I leave and go at 9:00AM I get there and one of the hoses breaks, but that's not really important, so mom drops me off and I wash cars, (side note: the freshmem girls that were there DROVE ME NUTS! they were like "um like how do you wash the car? i'm not sure i've never really washed one before" HELLO?! you take a sponge from the bucket and then you scrub the car! WOW. its really not that hard of a concept to grasp....at least not for the normal person...they were just being dumb most of the day which really irritates me.) it's really hot and sunny, but I figure i'm going home at 12:00 its okay, i won't put on any suntan lotion, i'm usually okay, so about 11:50, Elisa asks me if I want to go prom dress shopping with her and Charlie...and I figure, this can't really be a bad horrible thing...I need to get out more often, and what else am i going to do...study?! cha! yeah riiiiiiight. I'll just be on the computer, that can't be any healthier, but by that time my mom had already left to come and pick me up, I felt really bad that I made her come all the way out here just to tell her i was going some place else. but she was was okay with it. But going shopping ment that I had to say until this thing was over because Charlie and Jeff were our rides, and staying until this was over ment staying until 2:00PM, and today was a very sunny and pretty warm day about 77F , and so make a long story short by the end of the day i was as red as a lobster. my arms are HORRIBLE. like I don't ever remember being so sunburnt. this is not good, next time take no chances, just put the lotion on....I just hope my mom doesn't see...eek she'd ask me why i didn't put on suntan lotion etc...but anyway by the end I was pretty tired, and I kinda just wanted to go home cause i feel tired and dirty, but no one is home to drive me anyways so i'm stuck. By the time we all clean up, we had to work out rides, frankly I would have been more comfortable going with Charlie because I know him a bit better and earlier i kept on watering Jeff because i thought he was done and I think he started getting really mad at me, but I had to drive with Jeff anyways. Picked up on some interesting information such as he and charlie aren't going to prom, because i asked whether he was buying a tux or not and he got really confused LoL , so i was like "are you buying a tux? since elisa was looking for a dress" and stuff and he was like, well i went to the other formal dance "winter ball" and that was lame so i didn't want to spend all that money again, and I was just like oooooh. If it had come to me I might have mentioned how a lot of the girls though he was going to ask out lilian or one of them....I think he would have gotten a good laugh out of that. and so we get to Carrow's. expensive food for that type of food and not all that great. So we have lunch there and Elisa and Jeff take forever to decide on what to order and charlie and I eat first, a range of conversation go on just that teenagers have, I can't remember much of it, but most of it was how you can't take jeff to a sit-down restaurant and other random gross things. this was the first time I had hung out with jeff and it was very different that Jeff at school, jeff at school is soooooooooo anal! but regular jeff is really easy-going and most of the time obscene, I was like hm i like this dude (not like "like") when we hung out at tiffany's house and then at school/school related events he's totally different though and i was beginning to wonder why i even liked him and then i see this side of him and i remember :) and I go ooooooh yeah. LoL I remember once Elisa telling me they didn't like each other because they had some fight or something etc. and then today they were flirting soooooooooo much elisa had her hands all over him! lol that was odd to see have to discuss that with her. So we go to a bunch of stores and Jeff is very girly like when shopping but really funny :) Its more fun shopping in a group :) Elisa didn't find her dress there, and we were all kind of tired, so we left the mall, but it was good I liked today, normal things, non-hermit things LoL and it was nice with some people that are loud, but not too loud. I liked all of the people that went today, unlike sometimes we go and there are a couple that drive me nuts. and Jeff's driving isn't so bad :)

My personal mood
I don't know, I feel uneasy, I don't feel right. It's like I feel like I'm not being productive, and I study or do work, but there always seems to be more work so it feels like I'm not going anywhere and then I feel tired and working too hard, and then I stop and try to do something fun, but nothing seems fun, i watch tv :( I read :( I play games :( I don't know. I feel like I'm not being social, and when I went to the car wash with many people, I didn't feel any better, almost relieved to go. When I study I feel like I know the material, when I take the test I feel like I know nothing. and this war isn't making me feel any better, should i be for it? should i be against it? will it really bring Iraqi people freedom or peace? or will it just kill them all? Will we just kill americans? and british? and the more I think about it the more i think of the things i have to do and it seems i have no time for free time but when I have free time it seems like I have too much and should be doing other things.

I think President Bush is an idiot. All this war will bring is death. It will not get Suddam out of power, it will not help the people of Iraq. It will help no one and it will only harm. How come he does not see this? Didn't anyone tell him how much this will cost? Didn't any one tell him we have an extrememly large budget deficit? Didn't anyone tell him there are so many more problems this country needs to fix before he wants to butt his nose into other countries business? I guess not. and it will cost us all.

my arm muscles are so sore i can't bearly lift them gr.. Hm. okay snow report: Let's see, ride up there okay, not bad, some parts stunk like MAD. like bleck i'm gonna hurl its so stinky, and Wendy's has okay chicken burger thingies...and no toilet paper for the bathrooms :lol: ...there were three cabins, the sr. girls, jr. girls and boys. The owners of the cabin stayed in 2 rooms, and i roomed with elisa up stairs in the last bed, freshmen girls had the loft and chrissy, lilian, janice, tiff and karen stayed in the living room. stayed up until 1:30 :) having the bed was a good thing :) electic heating blankets :D got up at 5:00AM...not so good... we left to go to the slopes and got threre at like 8 some mishaps with the rentals but we got it fixed and it snowed :D it was cool :) after that things went down hill....We took lessons at 9:50 and our instructer was such an a-hole. I just couldn't snow board, i'd go super fast and didnt know how to stop and the stupid instructer did even help at all, chrissy and I were just like forget this !$*&%&@(#!!! and they finished the lesson, and we just hung at the bottom. I was just pissed off because 1. i really wanted to have fun 2. it was 50 friggin dollars! so we didn't do much the whole afternoon....That night we showered and had dinner PIZZA! and just hung out it was pretty fun :) and we played spoons! it got really serious, LoL '04 against '03, Jordan and Joe cheated a lot but ohwell LoL it was still really fun, and Elisa and I stayed up and talked a bunch and then we just played in the snow the day after. Snow wars, everyone was so into it :) we were like shovling as much snow as possible, and making snowballs and just tossing the snow it was good, it was seniors against juniors, people were hecka snow wrestling! Tiffany and Ivy got so into it LoL they were hecka rolling around and everything LoL it was hilarious :) although in one of the wars a small piece of ice hit me right in the upper lip so i kinda split my lip, but it was eventually all good, but i didn't have snow shoes, only regular ones, and all this snow got bulit up in them because some of the snow was about a foot and half deep :D and then we got to ride on snowmobiles :) dude when those things go fast, they go fast but it was all good, if i find more pictures, I'll let you know :) i'm getting them developed, but i didn't take it to the slopes so i'm relying on everyone else for those.

This weekend, I tried talking to jeff more because they all seem to leave him out. I think sometimes because he's so mature, there's mature as in wow how "responsible and mature" and then there's like overly mature like he's a 50 year old man in a 16 year old body :lol: I tried to get him to loosen up this weekend but wasn' t successful, but i didn't really work, but I got to talk to him more, not necessarly a bad thing :) And talking with elisa was cool, she was one of the only ones that didn't go so "girly-girl" and knew how a felt about them cause she felt the same way :) that was nice :) so we just chilled, and I had my hair in braids...very horrifying...LoL, i'll get pictures when they develop. oy. LoL over-all the good moments balance out the bad ones....next year will be better :D